Book Review – Mel Robbins: Let Them

I’ve just finished reading the book Let Them by Mel Robbins and wow… it is such an excellent, insightful read. What I especially loved is how Mel weaves powerful tools with her real, honest life experiences — it makes everything land so deeply and practically.

What really stood out for me is how closely Let Them aligns with the principles of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), developed by Russ Harris, author of The Happiness Trap. I’ve used these principals in supporting clients for over 10 years – quick and powerful.  Whilst the language maybe slightly different it’s the same wisdom.

Here are some of my key takeaways — and how they link beautifully with ACT:

The 5-Second Rule (5,4,3,2,1… GO)
When something feels hard or uncomfortable — e.g. getting up when the alarm goes, opening bills, applying for jobs, doing presentations — Mel reminds us to interrupt procrastination and self-doubt with action bye counting down and doing it regardless.
I’ve used this many times before and it works. Try it now, before your brain talks you out of it.
👉 ACT link: Committed action — doing what matters even when discomfort shows up.

Consistency over perfection
Small actions, done daily, creates powerful change.
👉 ACT link: Values-based living — choosing actions aligned with who you want to be, again and again.

High-5 yourself in the mirror
Start your day with encouragement, positive self-talk, and actually feel it emotionally which makes it an incantation rather than affirmation.
e.g. “Today is going to be a great day. I am capable. I am enough.  See yourself achieving your goals”.
👉 ACT link: Self-compassion and defusion — changing how you relate to thoughts, not fighting them.

Stop wasting precious time on what other people think
Let people think whatever they want. Take action anyway — because only you can live your life.
👉 ACT link: Acceptance — allowing thoughts and opinions to exist without getting tangled in them.

‘Let Them’ … then ‘Let Me’
Let others behave how they choose — and then empower yourself with Let Me:
What can I control? What action can I take?
👉 ACT link: Psychological flexibility — releasing what’s outside your control and focusing on meaningful action.

Friendships change — and that’s okay
Mel explains so well how relationships evolve as we grow, and how we can adapt without guilt or resentment.
👉 ACT link: Acceptance and values — allowing change while staying true to what matters to you now in line with your values.

Stop bailing people out
Helping those near and dear to us (especially as more adult children are living at home for much longer nowadays) can feel good in the moment, but it can rob them of their learning and growth. This is such a powerful reframe.
👉 ACT link: Healthy boundaries and acceptance of discomfort.

When relationships end: create space
Mel suggests no contact for around 30 days — this means no contact at all, no messages, looking at photos, or replaying memories — to prevent emotional triggers from reactivating.  Doing this allow the nervous system to settle down 
👉 ACT link: Defusion — taking the power out of your thoughts enabling your nervous system time to settle so emotions can naturally soften.

Overall, Let Them is empowering, compassionate, and incredibly practical. If you’re familiar with ACT, you’ll recognise the wisdom immediately — just delivered in Mel’s warm, relatable, straight-talk style.

If you’re feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or caught up in other people’s expectations… this book is a gentle but powerful nudge back to yourself.

If you would like a complimentary consultation so I can share more with you on how I could help you move forward then get in touch now as I would be delighted to share more with you.